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自由之旅的驿站

邦霍华、编译:山卉

本文原刊于《举目》第11期

       简介:《作门徒的代价》的作者邦霍华,是二战时期年轻有声望的德国牧师。因涉嫌反对纳粹而被捕。狱中他潜心精研圣经,写下许多见解独到、令人信服、感人肺腑的讲章、诗文和书信。

          他对生活的热忱,对人的关心,以及他的知识、智慧、胆识和略具孩子气的谦卑,博得了其他狱囚及监狱看守的好感和厚爱。自然,这意味着他因此享受一些特别优待,如可以破例对外传递书信和文章。

          邦霍华被公认为廿世纪最有前途的神学家之一,但他不是一位纯理念的学者。他在狱中极有限的条件下,以生命传扬光明之道。本文要介绍的这首诗〈自由之旅的驿 站〉写于他就义前几个月。当时纳粹战败,急于处理一批关押著的政治犯,就在联军解放前几天,盖世太保的头子希姆莱亲自下令,将邦霍华处以吊刑。他时年卅九 岁。仓促中连向未婚妻和家人道别的机会也没有。但这首诗却表达了他对自由的向望和对死亡的无畏。

          人类自堕落以来,便在层层次次、方方面面 受到罪的挟制:或摆脱不了肉身欲望的 牵制,或屡败于血气骄妄之下,或心智上辨别不清,或胆小怕事裹足不前,等等。但无论何人,因着神赐下的印记,都有一 颗渴望摆脱束缚,作自己主人的心,都有一个愿天下好人一生平安的愿望。那么,这首诗便是邦霍华对这一人生追求的探讨后的结论:人要于诸事中自制律己,要大 胆敢为,要勇于承担苦难,不要畏惧死亡。死亡是短暂人生的中继站,信心坚定的人们必要转上通往真正自由的列车,在天国里瞻仰永恒的荣美。

          这首诗一共分为四段:律己、敢为、苦难、死亡。Frank Clarke英译,笔者根据自己的感受重新分行。

律己 (Discipline)

If you set out to seek freedom, then learn
above all things to govern
your soul and your senses, for fear
that your passions and longing may lead you away
from the path you should follow. Chaste
be your mind and your body, and both in subjection,
obediently, steadfastly, seeking
the aim set before them;
only through discipline
may a man learn to be free.

如果执著地寻索自由
就当于尘事纷扰之中
把握心灵和感受
唯恐激情与渴望
令你中途迷失方向

让圣洁,常驻身心
让谦卑,伴随不懈的追求
皆因必先律己
方后得自由

敢为(Action)

Daring to do what is right, not
what fancy may tell you,
valiantly grasping occasions, not
cravenly doubting — freedom
comes only through deeds, not
through thoughts taking wing.

Faint not nor fear, but go
out to the storm and the action,
trusting in God
whose commandment you faithfully follow;
freedom, exultant will
welcome your spirit with joy.

敢于去做正确之事
勿为偏好所左右
有抓住时机的胆识
无懦夫般的迟疑
自由,本贯穿于行动
而非翩翩思绪

不胆怯,不畏惧
暴风骤雨的情势
正是信靠神和祂的律之时
自由,必托起你的灵
使之充满喜乐

苦难 (Suffering)

A change has come indeed. Your hands,
so strong and active, are bound;
in helplessness now you see
your action is ended;
you sigh in relief; your cause
committing to stronger hands; so now
you may rest contented. Only
for one blissful moment could you
draw near to touch freedom; then,
that it might be perfected in glory,
you gave it to God.

事态急转直下
你有力的双手被缠缚
无奈何一切似已告终
你叹息无悔,你的事业
已交托在你神的手里
苦难时欣慰的一瞬
你已靠近自由
然为使其在荣美中成全
你又将它交与神

死亡 (Death)

Come now, thou greatest of feasts
on the journey to freedom eternal;
death, cast aside
all the burdensome chains, and demolish
the walls of our temporal body,
the walls of our souls that are blinded,
so that at last we may see
that which here remains hidden. Freedom,
how long we have sought thee
in discipline, action, and suffering; dying,
we now may behold thee
revealed in the Lord.

来吧!死亡,终极自由之旅上的盛宴
你将沈重的枷锁松卸
将必逝的身躯拆毁
令蒙蔽的灵魂苏醒

终在最后一刻,我们瞥见
那常隐藏的永恒
自由啊
曾为你衣带渐宽
历经律己,敢为和苦难
却于生命将尽之际
得以瞻仰你的真容

作者来自中国,现在美国北加州工作。

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